Faith not Fear of the Future

As I am looking for my true self and trying to establish goals and clarity for the future I am having trouble answering some of the questions that keep coming up for me.  

1) What do I want? 

2) How do I want to feel?

3) What do I really want my life to be about in the upcoming year? 

4) How do I want to spend my time?

5) Who do I want to become?  

This is a lot, but for now I am going to just be curious and throw out so ideas that come to mind.  I'm going to let go of the ideal and precise answers and just write. 

Let’s start with what do I want?  I want to be a good Mom and role model for my daughter and women who are struggling with mid-life. I want to spend more time in nature, on adventures, being curious and finding ways to better myself and feel fulfilled.  I want to get out and meet more people.  Learn a new skill like archery, get certified as a personal trainer, or take a psychology class.   I think I want to move and not be afraid of what change would look like. 

I want to feel healthy, fulfilled, confident and comfortable in the uncomfortable.  I want to laugh out loud, be playful, and take risks.  I want to be in love and passionate about the people in my life. 

I want my life to be about sharing my time with others, finding myself and helping them find themselves in the outdoors with GOD and nature.  I want the next year to be about finding myself and reinventing myself to become the little girl I was born to be.  I want to be kind, compassionate, caring and encouraging to myself and others.  I WANT TO BE OUTSIDE AND WARM! 

I want to spend my time learning something new, trying new things, stepping into the unknown, sharing my time with others but keeping time to myself.  I want to exercise, cook, play, sing, dance and HIKE!  I want to have great conversations, give big hugs, move my body, read, grow and flourish.

I want to become BETTER, Elevate myself to the next level.  I want to not settle for the easy or routine.  I want to push myself out of my box and be brave!  I want to be a badass but beautiful on the inside and out.  I want to be less judgmental, more kind, less rigid, more free flowing, less in my head and more in my heart.  I want to be excited for something and schedule things to look forward to.  I want to spend less on material things and more on adventures.  I want to keep my hippy self and professional self in sync and give them equal time.  I want to love again and THRIVE! I want to be open to receive and grow in my faith!  t